Trust and Distance in motherhood

Distance, it’s something which you have to let grow between you and your children, and it should be something grown out of love and respect. As they grow, as they become independent, it’s like an invisible bubble, it’s a distance cushioned by trust, knowing, and security, our children grow to move away from us, but the confidence in that is the knowing that you are always there no matter how far you may be.

From the first time your child starts to crawl and walk, from the time they let go of your hand on a walk out..to the last time they hold you hand on the way to school…these things as a parent can feel daunting and so sad, but they are signs of a growing independent being.

My son age 13 at weekend, independently took a short tram ride into the town centre with his friends for a birthday, they went for lunch, to crazy golf and the cinema, before heading home to watch the football.

It was one of the best days of his young life - the confidence in his voice when I rang to check he was ok, the fun he had.

It was a milestone moment for us, I know he is sensible and trustworthy for such responsibility, I know he is polite to others and knows how to seek help should he need it, his friends I know are the same. For some this may seem to young (my mum certainly was uneasy with it) but as a child, I was not afforded such independence and I do feel that impacted to some extent my confidence as an adult.

How can we build trust?

• a little goes a long way, start small with independent tasks, choosing items in shops, waiting outside shops whilst your children go in to choose something, letting them walk to the shop, take the lead crossing the road with you there.

• allow them to see how much you trust them, with trust comes responsibility and I think that when you show this trust they feel that, and feel that responsibility

• have clear and consistent boundaries, I asked my son to phone me or text me at certain points in the day, I think these boundaries are so important in building that relationship of trust.

What are your thoughts on nurturing independence in children?

#teenageyears#nurturingindependence#steiner#earlychildhood#boundaries#children#parenting

Elderflower Tincture

Elderflower, not only does it smell divine on a summers day, not only do pollinators love it’s sweet scent and delicate flowers, it makes great cordial, champagne, flavours cakes beautifully and even looks great in flower arrangements. Did you know it also has amazing anti-inflammatory properties, it is high in anti-oxidants and vitamin C, is antiseptic and anti viral and therefore is also a great addition to your medicine cabinet ahead of the colder months setting in.

“Tinctures are concentrated herbal extracts made by soaking the bark, berries, leaves (dried or fresh), or roots from one or more plants in alcohol or vinegar. The alcohol or vinegar pulls out the active ingredients in the plant parts, concentrating them as a liquid”

They can be great homemade herbal for many things and Elderflower tincture is great for the common cold, for helping to clear sinuses and as a pick me up when feeling a little run down .

🌱Make your own tincture whilst elderflower is in bloom.

Pack a sterilised jar with elderflower heads (cut as much of the stems off as possible as these are toxic) and cover completely with a clear alcohol / vinegar (I use 40%+ vodka) seal with a lid and store in a cool dark place for about eight weeks, shaking the contents once a week (label the jar so you don’t forget when you started it)

After eight weeks, strain the contents and decant into a dark dropper bottle to keep it as fresh as you can, you can keep it in the fridge if you like but it will keep in a cool dark place (don’t forget to label it)

To use dissolve a teaspoon in cold water twice a day, to help symptoms of a sinus infection or cold and to give the immune system a little boost.

I’ve made mine ready for this winter, a bottle small enough that can be used and a batch made fresh next summer! Harness the power of natural remedies and have a go yourself.

A few thoughts on Aromatherapy

Aromatherapy, the process of using extracts from aromatic plants for the purpose of healing. Essential oils used in aromatherapy are extracted from only a select number of aromatic plants in Nature, oils can be extracted from the flower top, petals, leaves, bark, resin, roots and seeds and all depend on the plant, some plants give us one oil, others such as Bitter Orange give us three.

Today aromatherapy is no longer confined to spas and holistic treatment centres. Many people today, families like mine, deeply aware of a climate crisis, searching for natural products which promote mental and physical wellbeing, which also help with personal care, beauty and even home care are embracing the powerful benefits of the essential oil.

I first explored the power of these oils in my home through diffusion and inhalation. I started simple in the home with some basic home made cleaning sprays, linen mists and laundry solutions.I worked my way through personal care products, a deodorant, a nourishing facial oil, body butter, only when I was recommended doTERRA's Serenity Softgels for sleep problems which were affecting my mental and physical wellbeing did I truly feel the power of these oils and wanted to harness their goodness for my family. I started studying clinical aromatherapy as well as aromatherapy as a standalone course and from my studies I recently made a simple balm for my daughters sensitive skin and was amazed at the results.

Essential oils are powerful but they are also volatile. As I have read and delved more into the industry I have become aware of how un-regulated the essential oil industry is (as it is classed as a cosmetic) . When inhaled through diffusion these oils effect the body and mind, when massaged into the skin they are absorbed directly into the blood stream. It is therefore so important we are not only 100% confident in the purity of the oils we purchase but that we learn how to use them correctly and safely. Essential oils are AMAZING, they are known to have anti-bacterial, anti-fungal and anti viral properties. Along with each oils very individual characteristics, they can be used in a myriad of ways to help wellbeing.

Synthetic industrial chemicals and fragrances used in most shop bought products can with long term exposure aggravate health conditions such as asthma, skin conditions and even lead to serious health conditions such as cancer. It can be an overwhelming thought to try and get rid of all these products which have become so part of our routine, of our identity, of our home and replace them with something better, but I want to slowly help you on your way.

Follow me on my journey #thearomatherapyatelier and learn as I do, gain all the information you need to make an informed choice about essential oils and how you can safely weave them into your life, and into your home.

Do you think essential oils could benefit you and your family? Would you like to know more about a particular topic? Let me know in the comments.